Idealogian

Imaginary iPod

For those who want the cachet of an iPod but can't afford its hefty price tag, simply combine the Paper iPod with a T-pod, and you're halfway to cool.

Security Breach - An Idealogian Exclusive Investigative Report

Since 9/11, the level of security in downtown New York has been consistently high. Or has it? This special investigative report will make you question everything you ever thought you knew about security.

Within months of the attack against the World Trade Center, which took place only a few short blocks from my office, new security regulations were implemented at my company's headquarters, including the presence of bomb-sniffing dogs and the requirement that all bags entering the building be placed through an x-ray scanner. But have these measures been effective? Are they even being properly executed? Or are they just lulling us into a dangerously false sense of security?

Last week, only two weeks after a renewed threat warning to New York's financial institutions, I decided to try to answer some of these questions. What I found will shock you.

In preparation for a friend's wedding, I packed up my bag with my full set of juggling supplies, including my three clubs and three knives:

Yes, they're sharp; yes, they're heavy; and yes, they can cut. Armed with this veritable arsenal of dangerous weapons, I calmly entered the building and placed my bag on the conveyer belt going into the scanner, as this hidden camera photo shows:

I was astounded and dismayed to see that the bag passed through virtually unnoticed by the attendant, and I was allowed to enter the building, no questions asked. Had I been a terrorist, I could have proceeded to any of the workplace floors and begun beheading people at whim, leaving a path of bloody havoc and destruction in my wake.

And what was the reaction of the security forces to this horrific breach? Absolutely nothing. In fact, the chief of building security wasn't even reached for comment.

^*

Having answered the questions posed at the beginning of this report, there is but one question left to answer: will this disgraceful conduct be improved before it's too late?

* Dramatization; this is actually a photo of my own hand and has very little to do with anything. I just figured that no exposé is complete without a "hand-in-the-camera" shot.

P.S. Though the tone of this piece is greatly exaggerated, it's actually entirely true; and yes, the knives really can cut.

Spam

"We felt that the key to the new law was enforcement."

The brilliant thing about this quote is that it's absolutely idiotic and yet its utterer somehow managed to get it into the New York Times anyway. When is enforcement not the key to a new law? If a law has been recently enacted, presumably it was because people were enjoying the freedom of acting contrary to that law. If the law isn't enforced, why would they stop? So while the context in this article was anti-spam laws, the quote could just as easily apply to pretty much anything else.

Later in the article, we find this gem:

Spam has proven to be a plague of the modern world that has defied nearly every effort to mitigate its effects.

Nothing like a little absurd hyperbole to put things in perspective. Why, compared to the plagues of the old world, like say, the 10 plagues, or perhaps the Plague, spam seems downright friendly by contrast.

Socks

Having lost the overwhelming majority of my socks to the sock gremlins, I was forced to go out this week and buy some new socks. And now I realize that I really should do it more often. There's nothing quite like the feeling of putting on a new, fresh pair of socks in the morning. In fact, I think my first act as a rich man* will be to set up a sock endowment for myself to ensure that I have a new pair of socks every day.

* Still working on it; let me know if you have any good ideas and maybe I'll give you a commission

Reuven's Recipe corneR - Strawberry Rhubarb Compote

It's been a while since I've posted a recipe, and this is one that I just had to post before summer is over. One of the easiest desserts imaginable is also one of the surest crowd-pleasers, especially on a hot summer day.

Strawberry Rhubarb Compote

Ingredients:
2 bags of frozen strawberries
2 bags of frozen rhubarb
3/4 c. sugar
About 1/8 c. water

Instructions:
1. Put all the ingredients in a pot. (Leave the pot uncovered - this has a tendency to boil over if it's covered.) Turn the flame on to medium.

2. Cook until it has broken down into a thick, simmering mixture, with some chunks still remaining (30-45 minutes; I find that it usually turns a bit frothy on the top when it's done).

3. Remove from heat. After cooling a bit, place in refrigerator and chill overnight. (Once it's cold, you may want to taste it and add a bit more sugar if necessary.)

4. Serve cold. For fancy presentation, sprinkle some blueberries on top or garnish with thin slices of kiwi.

Thanks for the recipe, Mom!

Water Furniture

River Table

Aquarium Washbasin

Happy Anniversary to Me!

I almost forgot to acknowledge my one year anniversary. This is my 238^th post, and there have been 282 comments (not counting all the comment spam I've removed).

Y'hi ratzon that I should soon be zocheh to have the other kind of anniversary as well. (Well, relatively soon anyway. Couldn't really be less than a year from now.)

"We are all individuals!"

In his speech this past Shabbat, the rabbi of my shul spoke of all the young people who have recently joined the community, "whether couples or individuals." I like that (and told him so). For some reason, it sounds so much more dignifying than "singles" (though not quite as precise).

Ain't Gonna Surf on Saturday

Ruling Guides Orthodox Sites' Sabbath Sales

With the dilemma over Web-based businesses before him, Rabbi [Moshe] Heinemann [of Star-K Kosher Certification] recalled a 45-year-old related ruling by another renowned arbiter of Jewish law. The late Rabbi Yitzchok Weiss had said Orthodox-owned vending machines must be closed, because even though the owner isn't present to make the exchange, he still collects the money. The parallel precedent seemed clear, so Rabbi Heinemann's answer was that Web sites, too, must be unplugged, even though the owner isn't technically doing anything.

A Web site operated by an Orthodox Jew could remain open only "if the shopping cart on the Web site is shut down," ensuring that no actual transactions took place, Rabbi Heinemann ruled in his group's small but influential newsletter Kashrus Kurrents.

. . .

[Paul] Mendlowitz, [senior vice president of DiamondCard Processing Corp., a credit-card processing company,] who is Orthodox, and others countered that since most Web sites don't process transactions on Saturdays, no money changes hands, so the sites should be able to remain open. Israel Sendrovic, a retired executive vice president of the Federal Reserve Bank of New York, weighed in with the protestors, confirming that credit-card transactions over the Internet aren't generally processed Saturdays.

. . .

The rabbi heard from an array of people who disagreed with him on the Web site issue. He was inundated with phone calls both at work and his home, and after mulling over the decision, he handed down a rare reversal in the newsletter's latest issue in May.

"Technically speaking," he wrote, "the vendor's monetary acquisition, the kinyan kesef, happens on a weekday so there is no issue, prohibition of mekach umemkar, business sale transactions, on Shabbos."

Update: I found the original response and two clarifications on the Star-K website. They clarify that:

• "The time Shabbos and Yom Tov begins is determined by the entrepreneur's geographic location."

  (Jessica posed this question in the comments before I posted this update.)

• "There could be a potential problem when Yom Tov falls on a weekday because the authorization and the processing of the sale can take place on the same day... Therefore, one may be forbidden to keep the website open on Yom Tov, unless there is a pre-Yom Tov agreement with the processor, that batch reporting would take place after Yom Tov."

  (Good call, Dad! We always knew you had a gemara kup!)

Worth reading in full, especially if you run a web-based business.

Thanks for the link, Dad!

Scandal

The New York Times's most recent article on Governor McGreevy's resignation seems to leave out some important facts. It refers to "the taint of the scandal," but what exactly is the nature of that scandal? Reading the article, all you'd know is that he "announced his resignation on Thursday as he publicly acknowledged that he had had a sexual relationship with a man."

There's no mention of the fact that he's married, and thus this relationship constituted an affair. In fact, that aspect is what McGreevy himself emphasized in his announcement:

I am also here today because, shamefully, I engaged in adult consensual affair with another man, which violates my bonds of matrimony. It was wrong. It was foolish. It was inexcusable.

. . .

It makes little difference that as governor I am gay. In fact, having the ability to truthfully set forth my identity might have enabled me to be more forthright in fulfilling and discharging my constitutional obligations.

Given the circumstances surrounding the affair and its likely impact upon my family and my ability to govern, I have decided the right course of action is to resign.

Nor is there any mention of the allegations of sexual harassment and the pending lawsuit.

So why does the Times mention only the gay angle? Simple laziness? Or are they trying to make sexual orientation the larger issue? Or, perhaps more likely, are they trying to imply that McGreevy's opponents make sexual orientation the issue?

Food Storage Tip of the Day

If you're running low on honey and having trouble getting the remainder out of the jar, you can store the jar upside down so that all the honey flows to the top of the jar.

But - and this is the important part - if you choose to do this, it is absolutely imperative that, before you put the inverted honey away and leave it there unattended for weeks, you make positively sure that the top of the honey jar is closed. Tightly.

(Alternatively, though my experience shows this to be the less preferable option, you can make sure that you are well stocked with paper towels.)

Fight the Good Fight

Vice President Dick Cheney is now making fun of John Kerry for promising to fight "a more sensitive war on terror." Cheney's retort:

America has been in too many wars for any of our wishes, but not a one of them was won by being sensitive... A sensitive war will not destroy the evil men who killed 3,000 Americans and who seek the chemical, nuclear and biological weapons to kill hundreds of thousands more. The men who beheaded Daniel Pearl and Paul Johnson will not be impressed by our sensitivity.

Kerry's campaign is refuting Cheney's interpretation of his words, with a spokesman claiming that Kerry was referring to cooperation with allies. The context of his statement seems to support this:

I believe I can fight a more effective, more thoughtful, more strategic, more proactive, more sensitive war on terror that reaches out to other nations and brings them to our side.

What it comes down to is that neither of them actually supports fighting a more sensitive (in the usual sense of the word) war. Which is a shame. Because while it's true that no one ever won a war by being sensitive, it's also true that it's not entirely about winning the war. It's also about maintaining our national and personal character, as many of the mitzvot in D'varim 20 make clear.

No one ever won a war by sending home those who may be the best soldiers in the unit, just because they recently planted a field or built a house. No one ever won a war by leaving trees to stand in the way of an advancing army, just because those trees have a few apples hanging from them. And often (though not always) an army may gain a strong and critical advantage by making use of the element of surprise, rather than knocking on its enemies doors to propose peace. And yet we are commanded to do all these things, to be more sensitive in our wars.

Rav Aharon Lichtenstein once discussed the meaning of the verse, "Hashem ish milchamah; Hashem sh'mo" - "The Lord is a man of war; the Lord is His name." What does that even mean? Since the antecedent of the pronoun "His" is "Hashem," of course Hashem is His name! It's like saying, "Ploni is tall, and his name is Ploni."

Rav Lichtenstein explained that the pasuk is being very precise in its choice of terms. "Hashem" is the name of God that is generally used to emphasize His attribute mercy and kindness. We are being told that even when Hashem is playing the role of warrior, his name is still Hashem, i.e., he is still characterized by mercy and compassion. (See for example Hashem's rebuke to the angels as the Egyptians drown - "My handiwork is drowning in the sea and you're singing songs?" - when He is the one who drowned them. Note also that it is at the same time He is making this statement that B'nei Yisra'eil proclaim, "Hashem ish milchamah; Hashem sh'mo.")

"Ma hu channun v'rachum, af attah heyeih channun v'rachum" - just as He is compassionate and merciful, so must we be compassionate and merciful. We must not allow the blood of war to transform us into barbarians and savages. We must take care that our efforts are directed exclusively against those who are actually our enemies, minimizing as much as possible the adverse effects on those who are not.

As funny as it may sound, we must be sensitive warriors.

PhotoStamps

PhotoStamps is an interesting service, whereby you can have stamps produced with (almost) any picture you choose. At 85¢ for a 37¢ stamp (plus shipping and handling), it's not cheap, but I suppose it might be worth it for special occasions.

Thanks for the link, Dad!

Danish Diet

Denmark bans enriched cereals made by Kellogg

Danish health authorities yesterday said they have banned several vitamin-enriched products from the breakfast cereal maker Kellogg, saying they could be harmful if eaten regularly.

The Danish Veterinary and Food Administration (DVFA) turned down an application from the company to sell the new products, saying the levels proposed could pose a risk to consumers.

Kellogg’s insists fortification of its products was not new and that it had done so in other countries, including the United Kingdom, for many years.

The company told the DVFA of plans to add iron, calcium, vitamin B6 and folic acid to 12 cereals and six cereal bars.

A DVFA spokeswoman said: "We have done an evaluation and, based on what Danish people eat and the amount of vitamins and minerals they already consume, we think it would have a high impact.

"The amounts proposed could be harmful to general health or food safety."

Hmm... I think I'd be wary of taking diet advice from any country whose people are named after a dessert pastry.

Dollar Store

T: Sometimes things are just so slow around here I can't stand it. People move so slowly and get in the way. The other day I was in the Dollar Store and it took like forever for them to ring things up.

S: You'd think that in the Dollar Store, ringing things up wouldn't be such a challenging task.

Me [acting out the scenario]:

Employee #1 [holding up package of plates]: Price check on the paper plates!

Employee #2: Umm, they're, a dollar.

Employee #1: Right, right. And, uh, how 'bout these plastic cups?

Thou Shalt Not Be Afraid of Them

If thou shalt say ("Ki tomar") in thy heart: 'These nations are more than I; how can I dispossess them?' Thou shalt not be afraid of them; thou shalt well remember what the Lord thy God did unto Pharaoh, and unto all Egypt: the great trials which thine eyes saw, and the signs, and the wonders, and the mighty hand, and the outstretched arm, whereby the Lord thy God brought thee out; so shall the Lord thy God do unto all the peoples of whom thou art afraid. ... And the Lord thy God will cast out those nations before thee by little and little; ... But the Lord thy God shall deliver them up before thee, and shall discomfit them with a great discomfiture, until they be destroyed. And He shall deliver their kings into thy hand, and thou shalt make their name to perish from under heaven; there shall no man be able to stand against thee, until thou have destroyed them.

- Deuteronomy 7:17-24

Rashi explains the meaning of the first word of this selection, "ki," as "dilma" - perhaps. The time may come when you are fearful, and at the time, you should remember that it is in God's power to effectively deal with your enemies.

S'forno, however, alludes to a different explanation (and I believe the Netziv states it explicitly). "Ki" can mean not "perhaps," but "if" or "when." If, when faced with our enemies, we realize that we are unable to vanquish them ourselves, then we will come to the recognition that our only hope is to rely on God, who is certainly able to do so for us. When we reach that recognition, he will take it upon himself to defend us against our enemies. If, however, we put all our faith in our own abilities and believe that we can handle matters by ourselves, we will be left to fend for oursevles, and will ultimately fail in doing so.

(Apply this to the current situation in Israel as you see fit.)

It's My Party?

I noticed an interesting bentcher at s'udah sh'lishit today and pointed it out to D, who was sitting next to me and is getting married in ten days:

Me: Hmm... "Simchat Nissu'in shel Mishpachat Stern uMishpachat Rothkin."¹ Doesn't even mention the bride and groom. Just the families.

D: They're just telling it like it is.

¹"Wedding Celebration of the Stern Family and the Rothkin Family"

Public Service Announcement

Just a subtle, friendly reminder that there are only 132 shopping days left until my birthday.

Hellfire and Capitalism

Fear of Hell Might Fire Up the Economy

In a paper last year, economists Robert Barro and Rachel McCleary provided evidence that church attendance and economic growth are negatively related, but a belief in hell - their measure of religious beliefs - was positively related to increased economic growth. According to Barro and McCleary, increased church attendance could lower growth because of more resources flowing to the religious sector. However, the net effect would be uncertain because increased church attendance may also increase religious beliefs, which, as Weber believed, raises economic growth by spurring individual behavior and actions that are thought to encourage productivity. Interestingly, Barro and McCleary also found that economic performance was largely unrelated to the dominant religious theology of the nation.

As the editor's note above the piece explains, this article has been twice emended. However, the previous version (and even now the title and the cute little graphic of the devil spewing fire at the feet of workers) implied a somewhat direct cause-and-effect relationship between belief in hell and economic growth, with corruption as the "middle man" - belief in hell means lower corruption which means greater economic growth. There are actually a number of ways to interpret the correlation:

• Most directly - a fear of hell, and a desire to avoid it, moves people to be more honest; if hell is anything like this, that seems like a wise choice
• A fear of hell is likely accompanied by a general belief in divine reward and punishment, and a desire to avoid the latter moves people to be more honest
• A fear of hell is most likely accompanied by a belief in God, and the presumably associated belief that God wants one to be honest moves people to do so
• A fear of hell is indicative of a more religious personality, and that is usually (hopefully) accompanied by a stronger moral compass; the belief that morality dictates that one be honest moves people to do so

Should we choose to be not just economists and sociologists but theologians as well, we may propose an alternative connection between belief in hell and economic growth, cutting out the "middle man" of corruption. Those who believe in hell and are thus more honest and generally pious are rewarded by God for their piety with increased prosperity.

And of course it could all go the other way. Perhaps in countries where there is greater economic growth, individuals feel less of a personal need to resort to corruption, and their contentment with their lot in life fosters a strengthened belief in religion (and, by association, hell). The first half is actually an interesting question: are countries poor because they're corrupt or are they corrupt because they're poor (or both , creating a vicious cycle )? The second half, I think, is less likely. If anything, contentment probably leads to a weakening of religious intensity, as we are warned in this week's parshah:

Beware lest thou forget the Lord thy God, in not keeping His commandments, and His ordinances, and His statutes, which I command thee this day; lest when thou hast eaten and art satisfied, and hast built goodly houses, and dwelt therein; and when thy herds and thy flocks multiply, and thy silver and thy gold is multiplied, and all that thou hast is multiplied; then thy heart be lifted up, and thou forget the Lord thy God, who brought thee forth out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage ... and thou say in thy heart: "My power and the might of my hand hath gotten me this wealth."

- Deuteronomy 8:11-14,17

Thanks for the link, Ted!

Halal Halachah

Muslims get soft drinks go-ahead

Muslims in the UK have been given permission to consume soft drinks which contain minute traces of alcohol and pork products.

Under strict interpretation of Muslim law, Lucozade and Ribena were both previously considered to be "unclean".

Lucozade contains 0.01% ethyl alcohol to aid flavouring, which the Muslim Law Council now says is too small to matter

Ribena previously used gelatin - a pork by-product - in its production but has now changed its manufacturing methods.

. . .

"I see no harm in consuming Ribena and Lucozade which contain traces of ethyl alcohol and animal ingredients that do not bear their original qualities and do not change the taste, colour or smell of the product," [Muslim Law Council chair Zaki] Badawi said.

(Emphases mine.) Apparently Islamic "halachah" also believes in the concepts of bittul b'shishim¹ (at least) and notein ta'am.² I wonder, though, what the article means by "to aid flavouring" and whether that would be a problem in kashrut.

¹Bittul B'Shishim - the halachic concept that anything comprising less then 1/61^st of a mixture is considered insignificant
²Notein Ta'am - the halachic concept that a component that might otherwise have been considered insignificant cannot be ignored if it contributes to the taste of the overall mixture

The Very Funky Caterpillar

Here's a riddle for you: what's yellow, furry, and crawling up my leg?

Best I can determine from this site is that it's an acronicta aceris (#6), which is "generally common in England, Wales and parts of Ireland." And Washington Heights, apparently.

Retro Science

Seems that more and more, science is taking its cues from what people were doing thousands of years ago:

Wound-care clinics around the United States are giving maggots a try on some of their sickest patients after high-tech treatments fail.

It's a therapy quietly championed since the early 1990s by a California physician who's earned the nickname Dr. Maggot. But Dr. Ronald Sherman's maggots are getting more attention since, in January, they became the first live animals to win Food and Drug Administration approval -- as a medical device to clean out wounds.

A medical device? They remove the dead tissue that impedes healing "mechanically," FDA determined. It's called chewing.

But maggots do more than that, says Sherman, who raises the tiny, wormlike fly larvae in a laboratory at the University of California, Irvine. His research shows that in the mere two to three days they live in a wound, maggots also produce substances that kill bacteria and stimulate growth of healthy tissue.

. . .

This has been quite a year for wormlike critters. In June, FDA also gave its seal of approval to leeches, those bloodsuckers that help plastic surgeons save severed body parts by removing pooled blood and restoring circulation.

And this:

When Yoav Rosen was growing up in Jerusalem in the 1970's, he was obsessed with an act that was said to have been performed only by the likes of Jesus, Buddha and Hindu mystics - walking on water.

Last month, Mr. Rosen received a United States patent (No. 6,764,363) for a device that he says will allow ordinary people to do just that.

. . .

Mr. Rosen's device also resembles the 1858 design. His pontoons are made of Styrofoam and plywood, and are tethered together so the user's legs will not spread apart while walking.