Idealogian

Newdow Sues T.G.I. Friday's^®

WASHINGTON (Idealogian) -- Self-proclaimed atheist Michael Newdow, already famous for his Supreme Court lawsuit opposing the inclusion of the words "under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance, has filed a suit against self-described "authentic American restaurant and bar," T.G.I. Friday's®, alleging violation of his First Amendment right to freedom of religion.

"There is nothing 'authentic American' about religious coercion," Newdow argued in a press release accompanying the suit. "I should be able to take my daughter out for a decent dinner without expressing my gratitude to some non-existent deity. Despite the suggestions of some of my co-anti-religionists, it is unconscionable that in order to enjoy Friday's® delectable Philly cheesesteak sandwich, I should have to acknowledge and pay respect to a 'God' in whom I do not believe."

Newdow's reference to the restaurant's anagrammatic name itself stirred some controversy, as many maintain that "T.G.I.F." stands for "Thank Goodness It's Friday." Newdow contends, however, that reliable sources clearly indicate the true origins of the phrase to be "Thank God It's Friday."

When it was pointed out to Newdow that "Friday" itself is named after Frigga, the Norse goddess of love and fertility, he responded, "Oh, yeah. Well then that's gotta go too."